Posts tagged me
Posts tagged me
M: A sandwich, how do I draw a sandwich?
[types something on her computer]
Me: Did you just google sandwich?
M: Don’t judge me.
…
[Starts drawing]
M: Why does this look like a penis?
Me: What?
M: Just the top. There I’m finished. Does this look like a sandwich?
M: So I just found out that when you play pictionary the other person sees you as you draw it, not just the finished project. I spent 25 minutes drawing Elmo for Emily yesterday.
…
M: What do you think this is?
[Shows me a picture she drew]
Me: A camera?
M: YES! I’m getting better
…
M:What do you think this is?
[Shows me a pic she drew]
Me: A box?
M: YES!
…
M: Okay, I don’t wanna do David right now because he’s really good at theis game and that’s intimidating.
C: Do you have a beak on?
Me: What?
C: A beak? Do you have a beak on?
Me: What are you talking about? What do you mean beak?
C: Like a bird’s beak.
Me: That’s what I thought you meant but it makes no sense.
C: When you moved, it looked like your glasses had purple lenses and a red rim and there was a beak on them.
Me: I don;t know what you’re smoking.
M: STOP SPEAKING YOU’LL LIGHT YOURSELF ON FIRE! [Gets scared and is peeking through her fingers]
Me: We can change the channel if you want.
M: No, no, it’s okay.
…
M: NO DON”T DO THAT! CHANGE THE CHANNEL! CHANGE THE CHANNEL!
[Randene (I think?) and Squire are on tv.]
Me: What’s with the tie?
M: That’s Squire, don’t mess with him. [whispers] I think they’re doing it.
M: I heard Christmas music in Zellers today.
Me: I played Christmas music while I did my baking on the weekend.
M: It’s not even Dec - *checks phone* - its not even December yet.
Me: Did you just…
M: DON’T JUDGE ME
Mom: It’s not Donner’s fault his son [Rudolph] is disabled!
Me: Disabled? Disabled? Really? A red nose is disabled?
M: I need to butch up. Wait, that makes me sound like a lesbian. I need to man up! Wait, I sound like a man.
Me: So are you a lesbian or a man?
M: Neither! I have witnesses! I mean, a witness. No wait, plural. Wait… I’m going to stop now.
[The news shows a person wearing a Saskatchewan Roughriders shirt]
M:[BIG Calgary Stampeders stan]: He needs to get punched
[Girl wearing a Saskatchewan jersey]
M: She needs to get punched
[Baby wearing a Saskatchewan toque]
M: He needs to get punched
Me: What?!? Did you just say a baby needs to get punched? A baby?
M: Yeah, we need to sort it out early.
M: should I be a hockey player or a slutty hockey player?
Me: slutty hockey player
M: how do I do that?
Me: I don’t know but give me the option and it’s always gonna be slutty
——
M: do you have any slutty tops I can wear? I only have one bar top.
Me: yeah no problem, I’ll look now.
M: I don’t mean to imply that you’re slutty or anything…how about girly tops? Does that work?
Me: slutty, girly same thing! haha, I’ll look now. I’m being Pepper ANN!
M: you look really cool, I hope I do.
