M: I have to pee. I’ve had to pee since this morning but I’ve been too lazy to go.

M: My mom is friends with Jess? That’s weird. I wonder who our mutual friends are.

…

My mom has more friends than me?!?!

M: I wanna see Battleship. It looks like like a mix between Pearl Harbour, Aliens, Transformers and the Simpsons Movie.

M: I heard Christmas music in Zellers today.

Me: I played Christmas music while I did my baking on the weekend.

M: It’s not even Dec - *checks phone* - its not even December yet.

Me: Did you just…

M: DON’T JUDGE ME

Mom: The cowboy looks like Woody from Toy Story.

Cait: Who’s Woody’s best friend besides Andy?

Mom: I don’t know who Andy is.

Cait: The kid that owns him.

Mom: Oh. Well I don’t know Woody’s best friend.

Cait: It’s Buzz Lightyear of course.

Mom: They’re in the same movie together?

Mom: It’s not Donner’s fault his son [Rudolph] is disabled!

Me: Disabled? Disabled? Really? A red nose is disabled?

M: Was Emma Roberts in Harry Potter?

M: If I was obese I would probably have high blood pressure…from my weight…and my rantings.

M: I should be a body snatcher. They get paid not bad. Maybe in China or Taiwan. Im not being racist. Not in India though, because of the smell of curry.

“Well, it’s a relatively small space with nowhere to escape to.”

WHAT!?!? lmao I love her convos with her mom.